My Round Belly

Oh boy what a day! There are so many many things that happened today, but I think I'll save some of them for a post tomorrow. In this post, I would like to discuss my belly. You'll see why it's round in a moment. Let's start at the beginning of the day:

When Mom woke up this morning, I was playing by myself in Dad's t-shirt drawer (I love it when the dressers aren't closed all the way!). I did not wake Mom and Dad up by jumping all over the bed and rubbing faces with them. But Mom did not notice my good behavior. She said I looked cute though. As she got up and did her morning routine, I followed her around, but I did not beg and yell for my breakfast like I usually do. Again she did not notice my good behavior. She kept looking at me though and said, "Mattingly, your belly looks much rounder than it did last night." She looked around a bit for places I might have gotten into things, but all was well in the kitchen. She kept looking and looking at me and said again, "I swear your belly is bigger than last night." And then, she found it. And it explained everything. See, last night Mom and Dad were going to have chicken for dinner, but when they opened the package, it smelled bad... (let's note here that it smelled bad to HUMANS). So Dad bagged it up and put it by the door where they put all garbage that needs to go out quickly. Well, during the night, that bag made it to the dirty clothes piled near the bathroom (hidden from Mom's view for the first few minutes of her day). I was a very busy kitty, tearing open the plastic bag, and then eating THREE whole tenderloins!! Oh it was wonderful. I've never had anything but my crunchies and some canned cat food before (well, I don't remember what I ate on the street). And for dessert, I chewed up a bunch of the styrofoam the chicken was sitting on. I'm a little disappointed at her response. She didn't yell, saying something about how it was her and Dad's fault. But I thought I would get lots of praise for taking so much initiative. I fed myself without their help... and even did it before breakfast so I wouldn't have to wake them up and then get in the way begging for breakfast while they got ready for work. No appreciation whatsoever. And on top of that, I didn't get any crunchies for breakfast. Hmph. Mom couldn't go to work today so she was home... she said she was just waiting for me to throw up because that was bad chicken... but I haven't. I have pooped three times though, and it's not even dinner yet. Oh and Mom took pictures of the scene, but hasn't had a chance to upload them yet. Still waiting on batteries for the camera. She said it was a miracle the camera stayed on long enough to get the pictures she did. I can't wait to show it off to you!

Well, I'm sorry that they didn't notice I was such a good kitty. I'll have to put forth more effort in the future. Even if I did get in trouble, it was all worth it. I shall remember that night for a long time. I'm going to go sleep now and work on making some more poop. I have a lot to get out of me. Hope I get dinner tonight!